Monday, August 12, 2019

Just Another Night (Abstractions - Screech)


Just Another Night

It's just another night,
Sleepless, breathless,
Still trying hard to keep alive,
Keeping up the fight.
I know I'm gonna fall,
End it all,
Smash my head against the wall,
My court is full of balls,
That I'm never gonna hit back.
Closure is how I keep track.
I don't think I deserve this,
Does it matter?
It doesn't, I don't think,
No, wait, I do,
Here comes another thought.
Tearing me apart,
Building these worlds with no substance,
Out of thin air and no sustenance.
Break me, shatter these dreams,
Help me fill sound in these inaudible screams,
Nobody is as fucked up as me.
How can they even forgive me?
I should be cast out, imprisoned,
I should be serving a sentence.
Guess I am,
I'm living with the pain,
It's killing my brain.
I never had the chance to choose,
I got nothing to gain,
Nothing to lose.
Feel like I've always done wrong,
That's right, nothing right,
Left with what ifs and what not,
Still I fight,
Find different ways to sing the same song.
I know me, no one else,
They just stop making sense.
Nobody looks within,
They look out,
Without sparing expense,
Living in the present tense,
Digging up to resentment,
Not knowing anything,
Just spending to end up spent.
Batteries running low,
Engines running on fumes,
Unsure of where to go,
Tunneling through the walls of rooms,
Turning out to be mazes,
Splitting lanes doesn't work on these roads.
Knowing, preaching, teaching my ways,
But not following my rules,
Unsure of what to do,
Scared of the unknown faces.

Sounds annoy me,
Words destroy me,
Minds tear me apart,
Rip me in two,
Two weeks and they ran away.
Wound me up like toy,
Captivated in captivity,
Slave to one Helen of Troy,
God damn it, you fool,
I was just a little boy.
Died enroute to a place that I could call home,
It couldn't even be the real McCoy.
My oh my,
Turns out I was living a real lie,
Everyone in my life is a spy,
No, I'm not paranoid,
I'm just trying,
To understand whether I'm falling or flying.
Pleading with agony,
To leave me for nobody else,
Vaporize into the atmosphere,
Never rain down, instead, forget itself,
And hopefully end up dying,
No fear.
No sleep, I just end up being anxious,
Forgive me if I seem rambunctious.
Can't breathe, I'm not worth the high shelf,
Dive too deep, I feel I'm drowning myself.
Split three ways, these headaches from hell,
Mind, heart, soul, never in harmony,
I'm out of my mind, you can't tell,
Shot through the heart, and I'm too late,
Soul taken by Satan, lucky me,
I'm poisoned by food I put on my plate.
Can't pick up where I left off,
No lengths I can go to,
Nowhere to run, brush the dust off,
Get up and get a move on,
No strength, nothing left to do.
Life plays out like a motion picture,
No ways to an end, nothing reborn,
Frequently fed fatal elixir,
Can't stop, too many pieces to move.
What's wrong with wanting?
God knows, I'm waiting for my doom.

Lost my focus,
I used to be strong, used to be smart,
I've given in to everything I hated,
I'm broken and still hell bent,
Slowed down almost to a halt,
One thousand hours I've waited,
Seems solitude and solace are godsent.
Legends of old seem to show the way,
As I lay dying in my own grave,
That I dug with my bare hands,
Like a dog, I bark in infrasounds.
It's been ruff, I swear,
Protest the behaviour,
An unwelcome saviour,
My verses are nefarious,
Of peaces and wars like Varius.

Let it be,
It's just another night,
I'm sure there will be an answer.
I've achieved ascension,
Or so I concur,
I've demystified apprehension,
And tried to see.
Let it go,
It's just another light,
I'm sure there will be more,
Shining brighter than before,
I've achieved a bliss,
I believe so,
Here's cheers,
To the shots that I've missed.


No comments:

Post a Comment