The Specialist

The Specialist

Specifications,

Generalizations,

Wars of nations,

Radio stations,

News channels,

Solar panels,

CDs and Vinyls,

Semis and finals.

Randomly accessed,

Failing and practice,

Protect and hack shit,

Snakes on a rat stick.

Does it make sense yet?

Is it too hard to get?

Talk to talk,

Walk to run,

Where's the fun?

Used my voices,

Screaming my vices,

It has its place,

Not in everyone's face.

Need to learn, need to see,

More than ever, I need to be.

Aggro all the time,

Who am I?

Not this rat I've become,

This isn't how I fight.

I know this is not right,

So what do I do about it?

I strive to judge correctly,

But where have I misjudged it exactly?

There's no excuse,

They say it's okay,

But is it?

I've blown my fuse,

But that's not how I play.

Treated things as transactions,

Aerated arrogance in my actions.

Why? Why? Why?

Always been my question.

Nobody can answer it,

Because they don't know it either,

Right?

So I'm left to judge it,

My oh my!

My mantra is inconsistency,

Why do I chant it constantly?

Maybe I should start a cult,

"Bring me your horizons",

And sunset each and every one.

I'm Thanos, baby,

Half the world is my oyster,

Non-existent, snapped in half,

Broken in two,

Lying to reach the truth.

Said a lot of things,

Done much more,

Always been sure,

Is that called being mature?

Fought to be where I am,

I got an aggressive nature,

But I'm wise.

I've fought the gods,

Saved Prometheus from his demise.

I stand just, I stand true,

I stand tall, I stand unskewed,

Beat you black and blue,

I've got a loose screw,

A short fuse,

Never leave a clue.

Take my worst enemy,

And smash their face in the mirror.

Embrace the rage,

One with the anger.

Turn the page,

Blow up the 18th hangar.

Should I light the sky with fire?

Burn the clouds, all the nine.

I'll be okay, I'll be fine.

But I think I'm done,

Mr Nice Guy isn't fun.

Crush the resistance,

Overkill the past tense,

Look to the future,

Stitch up the suture.

Think of the nights,

Think of the days,

Prepare for the worst,

And hope to end the phase.

The end is nowhere in sight,

Oh come on,

All I know is how to fight.

How am I supposed to get better,

When there's no competition?

I need to be by own rival,

I'm the Titan, I'm the legion.

My chords are false,

My words are walls,

My cries are calls,

I've tried it all.

Damn it, alright,

Yes, I'm suspicious.

The timing's off,

It all aligns too tight,

Within hours, it's vicious.

Toxic I've been,

Toxic I shall not stay,

I need to come clean,

I'll use my words to say,

I strive to be a better version of myself,

I strive to evolve everyday.

I strive to be more than who I was yesterday.

Forgive me sister, mother, father,

I've made mistakes.

Forgive me lover, friends, comrades,

I'll make it up to you I swear.

The best apology is changed behavior,

Or so they say.

True to myself, also I must stay,

For I am my own lord and savior.